It’s been a while since I’ve written things down. The best thing I can think of for it, is to write stuff and not stop. So, where have I been, what am I planning on, and what have I learned?

present (recent past)

Job: Dishwashing (daytime) to pay for my employee (oh, I have a programming startup). From oldest to newest, it was (highschool): mcdonalds, houseman, architect’s draftsman, biodiesel chemist, landscaper, (college): librarians’ assistant, postgis/c#/python intern, remote sales intern –mostly scheduling and data entry–, graveyards at walmart, dishwashing –evenings– housekeeping, middleschool cook, soup-kitchen driver, briefly cook at the dishwashing place, now daytime dishwasher and janitor.

I’ve had two other startups die (Hksp –hackspace– sole, and Generational Tech, partership). This one is going to be entirely funded by dishwashing wages and me yelling at my laptop.

Still trying to pack everything into a minimalist life (balanced with maybe having another person in that life at some point). Fond of things being well-built and with purpose, fond of packing and organizing items.

Kinky, as ever, after being a spoiled brat living off my parents to go to college. Upon the discovery of my evil deeds, college had to be funded on my own (not… entirely fond of their rules… mormon and gay rubberist don’t mix.) and it’s been too difficult to continue rigorous studies in mathematics/computer science (cryptography) while also paying rent. Spoiler alert, paying off the 12k left on the loan scares me, as does not having the car (tardis), or health/dental/vision/auto insurance. None of that is under threat as it seems they actively ignore, or at least aren’t snooping in as far, into my life as they used to. It costs them nothing to pay for the health stuff, though the car might get taken back, which would be disappointing.

future (predictions)

So long as things remain steady, I plan on taking school off in the spring to work more diligently than ever towards swapping my income, from dishwashing to programming, once again. It would allow me to pursue college again, and not go completely insane from cuts on my hands. What’s more, if the business takes a down-turn, many companies don’t like that I haven’t finished college and don’t have programming to show off.

It’s unlikely that the remaining 6 potential relationships will come to fruition, but if one of them did it would in large part shape my actions. I doubt in being able to find a match given my desire to also unplug once things are built and to specifications. No need to run around showing my face for deep-fake AIs.

I expect that the fallout from further decisions to become more independent would cause for a collapse of relations with the folks. It would be necessary to ensure transportation and insurance, if such a fallout occured. For the time being, I am, at least partially, both spoiled and at a checkmate.

It’s doubtful that employment opportunities would arise. Such are for the very, very lucky. If, in small part, I can do a thousand great tasks, hopefully that will gain me recognition and connections where they are needed.

Although I intend to unplug, that doesn’t mean I’ll stop participating with the friends I know. From Laramie Pride to Laramie Burlesque, to Laramie and Cheyenne kink meet-ups, to Denver Leather Bars, to Chicago Rubber Events, expect to see me around with the people I love. Just… less on Facebook and Tumblr and such.

lessons from the past

My focus is out of whack. Minimizing distractions and optimizing ideas for completion, into a tight loop of the ever-present and feasible, are of priority now.

I’ve always sluffed off things I didn’t need - from loose furniture to unneccesary gadgets. To some extent, that has also included finding one optimal job to go full-time on. Until I can narrow in my focus, that’ll have to include reducing school.

There’s lots of notes that I haven’t reviewed and updated, but the notebook of spare ideas is getting smaller and smaller (sorry, bye bye notes). The imporant thing for me is that I haven’t forgotten something I’ll need at present.

Continuing on this path, I’ll need to clarify my thoughts and strengthen my rigor, building up a toolset and covering ground until I succeed. It’ll take a while (A long, long while if I pay for it myself), but those who fail early on get right back up again, hear me?

Best,

Cam.